Selling your Ideas: Establish a Space for Cooperation

Avoid arguments: you can only lose.
Arguers will defend and embrace their previous positions.
Even “winning” will hurt the loser’s pride and build resentment.
A Guide to avoiding arguments:
1. Welcome the disagreement. Be thankful for a new opinion.
2. Stay calm.
3. Listen first. Hear your opponents out.
4. Identify areas of agreement.
5. Admitting errors will make it easier for others to admit theirs.
6. If no resolution is found, postpone action and promise to explore the opposing perspective.

Begin in a friendly way.
Open conversation with sincere praise, appreciation and sympathy.
A friendly tone will allow others to broach discussions more openly.
Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
Eagerly listen to concerns to diffuse tension and build relationships.
Others need to finish spilling their ideas before listening to you.
Be sympathetic.
Most people hunger for sympathy.
Tell them: “I’d feel the same way under those circumstances.”
Respect others’ opinions. Never say, "You're wrong."
People don’t like to admit they’re wrong and may take it personally.
If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
Demonstrate your willingness to rationally examine the facts.
If another is about to criticize you, don’t let them start!
A harsh self-rebuke may prompt the others to soften their critiques.
Admitting errors clears guilt and everyone to move forward quickly.
Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
Another’s perspective and motivation is the key to understanding their decisions, agenda and personality.
Frame requests in terms of what others find motivating.
Ask yourself: “Why would someone want to do what I'm asking?”